Recognizing Resilience

Over the past two weeks in my Batterer’s Intervention Program we have been discussing personal goal setting and measurable steps to take in order to complete personal goals. It struck me during the conversation that many of the men struggled with poor self-confidence (I’m sure some of you are like duh??? They’re are batterers, of course there are some self-confidence issues). Many of the men in my group are on parole and have spent more than their fair share of time incarcerated. As we discussed their personal goals, I asked them to share why they had not been successful completing goals in the past, that they set for themselves. I prefaced this question by telling them they had to take accountability for their actions as they reflected on past missteps. A look of bewilderment came across many of their faces. Many of them had never taken the time (or avoided the thoughts) to explore why they had not been successful on past endeavors. Furthermore, they struggled to verbalize their missteps without blaming someone or something for their past failures. Blame for not achieving their personal goals were placed on prison, women and parole officers to name a few. I concluded our discussion by explaining to them, that making steps to complete parole (or probation) and attending class consistently, showed resilience. I went on to explain to them that the resilience they showed in completing parole or probation could be carried over to other domains of their lives. Recognizing past resilience provides us with a template for accomplishing goals and/or overcoming adversity in the past. Building upon these skills can assist us all in completing personal goals we set for ourselves. Take the time to celebrate small successes in your life, it builds confidence, generally makes you feel better about yourself and provides a platform for personal growth. Peace, RJ

One thought on “Recognizing Resilience

  1. Pingback: Recognizing Resilience | Jackson Psychotherapy

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